May 29, 2026
đ§¨Robinhood Gives ChatGPT Margin Access⌠Trump’s Solar Curse Expires
Iâll take things that wonât end well for $100, Alex.
Imagine your AI stockbroker requesting the password to your entire net worth⌠Well, thanks to Vlad and the team over at Robinhood, you donât have to.
On a Friday that wasnât short of any exciting news⌠Gamestopâs arch nemesis going back to 2021, gained 10% after the fine folks over at Mizuho doubled down Vladâs new âAgentic Tradingâ tools. And yes, itâs exactly what it sounds like. A tool that allows AI assistants to execute trends and investment strategies with almost no human involvement.
If any other brokerage account like Schwab or Fidelity tried something like this⌠there would be a riot unlike anything weâve ever seen. But with the average Robinhood trader having the intelligence of a chicken, maybe this will actually end up becoming a risk management tool.
The firm surveyed users and found roughly 89% would consider opening a dedicated AI-managed trading account, while respondents said they’d allocate nearly a third of their portfolios to these digital money managers.
Because after years of losing money on meme stocks by themselves, investors have finally decided it’s time to automate the process.
Meanwhile, the indexes did not disappoint as they continue to hit levels that felt impossible just a month or two ago.
The Dow gained 0.6%, while the S&P 500 and Nasdaq added 0.3% as all three major indexes hovered near fresh record highs. The S&P is now on pace for its ninth consecutive week of gains, its longest winning streak since 2023.
And what’s powering this latest rally?
Well, partly AI.
Partly momentum.
And partly President Trump hopping onto Truth Social and announcing he’ll soon make a “final determination” regarding a potential Iran deal.
Although heâs still demanding Iran agree they wonât make nuclear weapons and must open the Strait of Hormuz without any tolls.
Meanwhile, Dell dropped earnings⌠and the suits on Wall Street proceeded to drop their pants. (Not a sentence you expected to see this century, huh?)
The company crushed estimates and raised expectations, telling investors that demand for AI servers remains absolutely bonkers as companies continue stuffing data centers with Nvidiachips.
Shares exploded 40% higher. The report also gave Alex Karp junkies another excuse to run through drywall. Palantirskyrocketed 10% after traders connected the dots back to its partnership with Dell, which integrates Palantir’s software into Dell’s AI Factory platform.
And President Trump, if you’re reading this (which, based on your posting frequency, isn’t exactly impossible), you may want to skip this next part.
Because after spending much of your second term treating solar energy like it keyed your golf cart…
Solar stocks just posted their best month since 2013.
The industry’s main ETF, TAN, is up 26% in May, while Enphase Energy has gone absolutely feral with a 110% gain and SolarEdge has rocketed nearly 80%.
Apparently, just like this overinflated bull market⌠solar stocks never got the memo that they’re supposed to be dead.
If you read all of this, congrats for having a 10 second attention span (better than me). As always, hereâs our heatmap for today.
Stop Finding Stocks AFTER They’re Famous
The market loves making people feel late.
You see a stock up 40%… Read the headlines… Pull up the chart…
Only to realize the move happened three days ago.
GuyStocks was created for traders who want to spot momentum before the crowd piles in.
Our alert system highlights stocks showing early signs of strength so you can focus on opportunities before they become front-page news.
đ Join GuyStocks FREE and confirm your subscription now.
(By clicking the link above, you are opting in to receive emails from this advertiser. You are also agreeing to the terms of our privacy policy. Unsubscribe at any time)
Amazon Shuts Down Internal AI Leaderboard After Tokenmaxxing Turns the Office Into a Cloud Casino
Live look at Amazon office employees using ChatGPT to pump their AI usage numbers upâŚ
Whoever had the genius idea of measuring employee success by how much AI they use at their desk should probably be on the first rocket to Mars (courtesy of SpaceX).
Not even two weeks after Amazonâs bald billionaire founder said everyone should stop worrying about AI taking their jobs⌠comparing AI to a bulldozer (as opposed to digging a hole the Great Depression way)…
Andy Jassy has officially pulled the plug on an internalâŚ
Elonâs IPO Roadshow Hits a Data Center Pothole After Late-Night X Post Scrambles Wall Street Math
Turns out the biggest risk to the SpaceX IPO isnât the lack of revenue⌠itâs Elonâs thumbsâŚ
You ever have that one friend who posts something on social media and somehow turns a simple situation into a full-blown mystery?
Well folks⌠Elon Musk just did that. To his own IPO. To SpaceX, the company trying to pull off what could become the largest IPO in human history. Which is generally the type of thing where investors prefer the CEO notâŚ
â Market Gossip
>Gap stock is falling, and it’s because of women’s dresses (Yahoo Finance):Pour one out for the lead designer.
>Blue Origin rocket explodes on launchpad during ground test (CNBC):SpaceX IPO valuation just went up another trillionâŚ
>Billionaire Trump allyâs ‘chilling’ move out of US sparks panic: âAbout to get bad news?’ (Raw Story): First Peter Thielâs anti-christ talks and now this? Brace yourself.
>BYDâs 5-minute charging luxury EV is catching on as deliveries top 10,000 (Electrek): Exhibit A for why Elonâs going all into SpaceX.
Anthropic Just Snatched the AI Crown at $965B⌠and Sam Altman’s Punching Drywall in 4K
Dario didnât hear no bellâŚ
And just like that, OpenAI is the silver medalist of Silicon Valley AI. Scam Altmanâs real-life âNewmanâ, Dario Amodei and his Anthropic Skynet Team, just closed a $65B Series H at a $965B valuation yesterday.
You might recall, OpenAI was last valued at $852B back in March. So Anthropic didn’t just edge past Sam Altman’s empire. It put the whole thing in a body bag while Sam was probably mid-twitter post. Even moreso, this is Anthropics Series H. Meaning, we are three letters away from Chamath Palihapitiya appearing in a puff of smoke and forcing a reverse merger with whatever SPAC he still has lying around LOL.
All jokes aside, this valuation nearly triples Anthropic’s February raise of $385B, which already felt unhinged. The question now is, does Anthropic deserve it? Well, try a $47B revenue run rate, up from $30B earlier this year and $10B last year. Claude Code (the coding assistant currently bleeding every engineering team for billable hours) is mainlining cash into Dario’s Scrooge McDuck pool. Anthropic also dropped Opus 4.8 yesterday and teased Claude Mythos Preview⌠the cybersecurity model so dangerous Anthropic has it on a velvet leash, an enterprise NDA, and a hand-picked roster of customers cleared to play with it.
So yeah⌠they deserve it. And as of late, these MFâers donât miss. Which only adds to theâŚ
âWTFâ Meme of the Day
âData centers are bad.â Long live data centersâŚ
Oh, and one more thingâŚ
What did you think about today’s newsletter?
đ§¨đ§¨đ§¨Loved it đ§¨đ§¨It was ok đ§¨Disliked it
1
2
Update your email preferences or unsubscribe here
Š 2026 The Final Tally by Stocks.News IR Agency LLC Disclaimer: Information provided is for informational purposes only, not investment advice. We do not recommend buying or selling stocks. Stock price discussions are based on publicly available data. Readers should conduct their own research or consult a financial advisor before investing. Owners of this site have current positions in stocks mentioned thru out the newsletter, app and website, Please Read Full Disclaimer for details Here https://app.stocks.news/page/disclaimer
23 Downing Street
Newark, NJ 07105, United StatesTerms of Service
RJ Hamster 